Practice like a Stoic: 27, Act the opposite of anger
Change your behavior, it will change your emotions
[This series of posts is based on A Handbook for New Stoics—How to Thrive in a World out of Your Control, co-authored by yours truly and Greg Lopez. It is a collection of 52 exercises, which we propose reader try out one per week during a whole year, to actually live like a Stoic. In Europe/UK the book is published by Rider under the title Live Like A Stoic. Below is this week’s prompt and a brief explanation of the pertinent philosophical background. Check the book for details on how to practice the exercise, download the exercise forms from The Experiment’s website, and comment below on how things are going. Greg and/or I will try our best to help out! This week’s exercise is found at pp. 164-166 of the paperback edition.]
“Fight hard with yourself and if you cannot conquer anger, do not let it conquer you: You have begun to get the better of it if it does not show itself, if it is not given vent. Let us conceal its symptoms, and as far as possible keep it secret and hidden. It will give us great trouble to do this, for it is eager to burst forth, to kindle our eyes and to transform our face. But if we allow it to show itself in our outward appearance, it is our master. Let it rather be locked in the innermost recesses of our breast, and be borne by us, not bear us. Nay, let us replace all its symptoms by their opposites; let us make our countenance more composed than usual, our voice milder, our step slower. Our inward thoughts gradually become influenced by our outward demeanor.” (Seneca, On Anger, 3.13)
Anger, Seneca famously said, is temporary madness. You can’t reason with it. The popular idea—suggested by Aristotle—that “a bit” of anger is actually a good thing is nonsense to the Stoics. Once you’re angry, reason has gone out to lunch, and you are liable to do things that you will regret—even if the anger was triggered by a just cause. Indeed, according to Dartmouth classics professor Margaret Graver, Seneca describes three phases of anger, which are also recognized by the American Psychological Association (APA).
The first phase is prereflective; that is, it occurs without conscious thought on our part and is inevitable. It takes place when we feel the sudden rise of a strong emotion and the need to retaliate with vehemence against whatever triggered the emotion. The second phase is cognitive: We briefly reflect on what is happening and recognize it as anger. We then rapidly review and judge its cause. The third phase takes place when we have given assent—as the Stoics would say—to the sensation. We now think that our anger is perfectly justified and let go of rational control, blindly following wherever the rage leads us. Seneca warns us, and the APA agrees, that the moment to act is at the beginning of the second phase. If we wait too long, all possibility of control is lost, and we have to hope that we won’t do something we can’t fix or that we’ll regret.
How, exactly, are we supposed to act in order to deal with anger and preclude the possibility that it will take over our faculties? In On Anger, Seneca lists a series of strategies, many of which you’ve already explored:
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